This Tikanga document from the Essentially Men Education Trust (EMET) forms the basis of an invitation to join a closed confidential group email list. It’s an interactive communication forum, which means you can talk to anyone in the EMET Google network through using the services of our group email list.
This forum is a way of staying connected in the spaces between our gatherings. We hope the content will be uplifting and open up ways for us to participate more fully in the flow of men’s lives.
It’s also an opportunity to be inspired by other men’s groups through talking about what’s happening in our journeys, without necessarily going through the Hub. By joining the group you agree to abide by the guidelines and Tikanga as set out below.
Essentially Men Google Group Tikanga
Summary
1. This Tikanga document from the Essentially Men Education Trust (The Trust) forms the basis of an invitation to join a closed, confidential Google Group (The Group).
2. By joining, you agree to:
● Use “I” language and speak your story from the heart
● Speak respectfully and take responsibility for your words
● Keep all posts confidential within The Group
● Be aware of your triggers and baggage, take time to respond
● Bring the gold to difficult conversations, rise don’t sink
● Not use abusive, aggressive, discriminatory or shaming language
● Avoid spam, political or religious campaigning, or repetitive promotion
● Respect the moderator’s requests and decisions without debate in The Group.
Introduction
3. The Group is an online communication forum through which you can talk with men in the Essentially Men network.
4. The Group is a way of staying connected in the spaces between our gatherings. We hope the content will be uplifting and open ways for us to participate more fully in the flow of men’s lives.
5. The Group exists to support positive connection, healing, and reflection among men associated with Essentially Men. The Group is managed by moderators who monitor, remind, moderate or in extreme cases remove posts in line with the Tikanga.
The Tikanga
6. By joining The Group you agree to follow the Tikanga. The Group is intended to work like an extended men's sharing circle and so uses much of the same circle Tikanga.
7. The Group is only for men who have completed a 'Men Being Real' weekend.
8. Confidentiality is critical in The Group. What you read in The Group is not yours to own. No man’s name or story is to be repeated outside of The Group. Please do not forward any messages from The Group or into AI.
9. You can share your experience with others not familiar with EM, such as work colleagues, sport colleagues, friends, family etc, but do not share another man’s name or his experience that he shared to The Group.
10. Participation in The Group means your name and email address will be visible to other members. Please do not share or use other members’ contact details outside The Group. Essentially Men will not share this data beyond The Group.
11. Do not post to The Group and simultaneously to other individuals or groups. If you wish to post the same content to multiple parties, then please send a separate and dedicated email to The Group.
12. The Trust encourages you to take ownership of what you say when posting to The Group. Please use ‘I’ language.
13. There is an old saying, “play the ball and not the man”. Please refer to this statement if in disagreement with someone on The Group. Debate the issue, don’t demean the man.
14. Watch your own inner stirrings if something on The Group pushes your buttons. Our reactions often take us to a deeper reflective place of understanding and are worth investigating. Be mindful of how easy it is to dash off a quick, possibly hot-headed response.
15. Advice giving is not encouraged unless requested. If you choose to give advice or feedback in response to a request, then please do so respectfully and speak from your own experience.
16. Philosophising and moralising can keep groups from being grounded and real; The Group is not the place for pushing any particular agenda.
17. The intention of helping another man towards finding greater truth, self-awareness, or healing may be part of our journey, but check in with your heart first around phrasing.
18. Above all, speak your truth gently from the heart, respect others, and honor the intent and spirit of Essentially Men.
19. The Group is not a place for derisive, offensive, or discriminatory language, inappropriate content, personal attacks, harassment, or threats. Such postings are not acceptable and will be moderated.
20. Moderation decisions are final and are made to preserve the integrity and safety of the community, not to judge any individual’s character.
21. The Trust hopes that the members of The Group will self-manage / moderate any breaches of the Tikanga. Moderators will step in when required.
22. We're a community. We think it's great that we can put out a call for practical help whenever we need it. Please use an informative header and lay out your need or offer in the text.
23. Any man is welcome to promote specific events that he considers to be of interest to The Group. Please start off your email with a personal introduction to the event you're promoting or forwarding and describe its relevance to you and/or the men on The Group. Do not post marketing links and content external to the Essentially Men network more than once.
24. Marketing on The Group is a grey area. We are fellow travelers on this road called life and many of us are genuinely interested in each other’s products or services. Make your posting personal, tell us what your relationship to the product is and leave out the hard sell. One test is, “Would I send this marketing email to my closest friends?”
25. The Group is yours to use and explore. If you're totally new, perhaps having just finished the weekend course, we encourage you to post a self-introduction — perhaps something about what you got out of the weekend you have just attended, to let the other men know that you have arrived. If you are an old hand and see a posting from a new man, then please welcome them aboard.
26. The men in The Group are not necessarily unified in their approaches to life, and this is what makes life on The Group interesting, fun, and sometimes challenging. The unifying factor is that all of us love the connection that starts at a Men Being Real weekend.
Thanks for your cooperation.
Essentially Men Education Trust
25 February 2026
Welcome to the Men Being Real-EM Group List.
G
Moderator on behalf of the Trustees
To join the EMET Community List click HERE